Stoney Discoveries

Well, as any college student knows, exam week is here. I've completed two of my four. I say "completed" because I'm not entirely sure I passed the Organic Chemistry I exam. But I fucking blew my Analytical Physics exam out of the water just now. I don't know how in the fuck it happened. I really don't.

I've been struggling through physics this whole semester because I got behind and stopped doing the homework. When I went to class, I was totally lost and had no clue what my professor was even writing on the board. It should never have gotten to that point, but I've learned my lesson. (Hopefully for the last God damn time.) Anyway, I was kind of uneasy about the exam prior to taking it since I had gotten so far behind and had so much to learn/study in so little time. Because, yes, I am the poster child for Procrastination.

I told myself I'd study this morning before the exam. THIS MORNING BEFORE THE EXAM. Kids start studying weeks in advance for their exams and I study the morning of. Jesus Christ. I may need more help than anticipated. Well of course I didn't get up when I first needed to... eight o'clock rolled around before I could even motivate myself to wake up. But this is where things get weird. There was a tiny bit of green left in the bong. Oh yeah, baby, I hit that. It wasn't enough to get me "high" but it was just enough to buzz. All of a sudden I got super productive. I started instantaneously planning what I was going to do, how I was going to do it and in what order. I turned on the shower to heat up, and while it heated, I flipped on the coffee maker to make coffee while I'm in the shower! Genius. I was making use of every second I had! Then came the studying...

Before I even cracked a book, I packed Marissa (yes, that's my baby in the sexy blue) with a little bit of dank and smoked just enough to get myself to a [2]. At that moment, every physics problem became the most interesting thing! I wanted to find the acceleration of the block down the rough incline! And I did! I was so persistent that I solved every problem I had time for. I killed it. I don't know what happened, but it was awesome.

So I was thinking...

You know how I've said that being high helps living in the moment? (If I haven't, pretend.) Well let me add on to that and also say that it allows you to focus more on anything you want. Think about it. When you're high, you only focus on one thing. I happen to fall to the dark side faster than my companions, so hunger tends to be my focus. But it can be anything, right? What if I made it my school work? Hold on, I might be on to something...

I'm actually very high at this very moment. And I'm typing faster than I usually would. The thoughts are flowing easier, and I find that typing them out is no longer a chore but a pattern of muscle memory that is innate. I mean, shit, I'm sitting next to a Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger from Wendy's and a half-full bong pack. But I was so focused, I continued to write.

Nom nom nom What, you think I'd mention that Jr. BC without taking a bite? You're crazy. (If you don't click that link, I'll be upset.)

I think I may have stumbled on something incredibly amazing. Seriously. I'm going to continue this high-studying and see what happens. Thought: Do I need to be high to take it? Confession: I was when I destroyed my exam this morning.

It's 4:20 somewhere...

WODCAOO

When One Door Closes, Another One Opens #canihashtagthis

Well the semester is essentially over, my fate 90% sealed. And it ain't lookin' purty.

It's happened again. Another semester started well, ended horribly. Change must occur. For starters: stop smoking so much. It's not even that I smoke so much, it's when I smoke. I get baked right after class and then it fucks up my whole day. Have fun trying to do homework coming down from a strong high, five hours later. It's got to stop. Now that my friend (who totally is the poster child for peer pressure) has a job, he isn't always around at that crucial time which is nice.

Okay, okay I know, you came here to read about weed! Well... the shit we have is grrreat!

It has a skunky, citrus-y smell and a tasty smoke. Yummy. Like, I actually want to smoke it to taste it...

In fact I'm too high to conti

Weeds

See? And you thought I'd post like one of those overly-persistent bloggers. Tsk Tsk

My damn joint just went out. Literally I picked it up 10 seconds ago. Damn it.

Anyways, I've starting watching the show Weeds and I think I'm in love. And not just with the show. I'm in love with the main character, Nancy. Hahaha She's the most badass badass and she's oddly attractive for her age. Back to my point, the show is wicked! It's probably the best stoner show ever! It's about a mom, who's husband just passed away, and trying to support herself and her children by selling weed. Sounds sketch, but it's the greatest fucking thing I've ever seen. 7 Seasons to go... and counting...

I got marvelously high off this tiny-ass, baggy-bottom shit. But when you think about it, the bottom of the bag is actually super fine and kiefy! I rolled a tiny J with a tobacco stop using the rest of what I had of Dank, and BOOM. And I think I like capitalizing strains/quality of bud. Makes it look more official.

So after watching the show a bit, I've started thinking... for the worse... I'd like to be a dealer my whole life. If it was feasible. It's definitely dangerous work (at least while it's illegal) and sometimes not a solid flow of income. Not to mention it's illegal. But if I could, I would. It's actually decent income that you really don't spend any time on. It gives you the options to do things like: pay for college, save for a car or house, just buy things you may need (there's a fine line between "need" and "want"). Plus, the people-to-people relations experience is incredible. You have to interact with soooo many types of people. Different everyday. You get good at talking to people and building a solid clientele. Game Over. You win.

If it's legal, we've embarked on an entire different planet. Three words. License. To. Grow. Regardless, you grow it anyway (NO, I do not grow) and open up a dispensary! Or will it even be called that?

dis·pen·sa·ry  

/disˈpensərē/

Noun A room where medicines are prepared and provided. A clinic provided by public or charitable funds.

Synonyms drugstore - pharmacy

 If it's not necessary to be medical, there will just be weed shops. And we'd open one. And if that didn't work out, a bakery. Scratch that. I have a better idea. And before I tell you, I'm going to High-Patent this:
It will be called "The Breakfast Joint". And the "i" in "joint" will be a joint! It will serve breakfast all day starting from like 11:00 AM to 2:00 AM or we can modify the hours based on how busy we are. And all menu items can be ordered as edibles for an added fee! Can you imagine?? I might seriously take out a small business loan if it gets legalized here! Open up three near me; one in Boone, one in Concord, and one in Charlotte. Same concept totally different feel. I would want the design and decor of the place to match it's surroundings. Each one would be different! Wouldn't that be sick to go to like a Breakfast Joint and have it feel like the mountains/rustic when you're in Boone, or the city/urban when you're in Charlotte? Dope. Too fucking cool.

I'm probably going to jail for conspiring to open a weed shop. 

I could honestly do either of those and be perfectly happy. Lots of money, tons of connections, the world at your fingertips hahah I wish.

Well that's all I can really stand right now... 

Lata, foo